To whom it may concern,
We decided to buy one of your sticky, wacky hands for our office to allow employees to grab things without getting up. Brilliant, right?
At first, it was great – our efficiency skyrocketed – we were able to grab pens and other supplies from distances never before possible. The office was ecstatic. What other uses would it have?
Sticking the hand to the ceiling above our co-worker’s head was thought to be a genius prank – one that would innocently startle the unaware victim below when it fell. We waited, and waited, and waited. As hours passed, we became increasingly anxious as to when it would fall and worried the joke would be all but wasted by falling over the weekend. To our dismay, the wacky hand was still firmly adhered to the ceiling when we returned that Monday. We were conned into believing we would be playing with our sticky hand for weeks and could not have been more wrong. Our blue wacky hand may now be lost forever.
Here we sit, writing this, with our sticky hand still cemented to the ceiling two entire weeks after it was originally thrown. We are deeply inconvenienced to have to reach out and inform you of this situation.
Your toy is capable of many things – including bringing much joy and saving bundles of time – but it has created a palpable sense of angst in our office.
Sincerely,
Disappointed (Martin, the intern)
**UPDATE: After 3 weeks, the thing is still on the ceiling.